♥ ♥ ♥ Sometimes I wonder if you think about me as much as I think about you -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - i haven't decided if it was the right thing to do or not. i was afraid if i did not say it, or if i did not test my own boundaries then i would lose him. i don't think i regret saying it, but i still wonder if it's true sometimes. i went to victoria for friday and saturday night, i caught the 1pm ferry back. instead of going home to make sure every thing is okay, i drove to j's place. i showered there and we went for a walk through the beautiful park by his house. i watched the constant gardener tonight, i had forgot how heart wrenching that movie was. the whole time i thought about him, and how much i'm sure i love him. then i think of how much of a failure i am to myself and wonder how he could love me. there, i said it... the "L" word. i tired to phone him after the movie to tell him that, but i guess he is sleeping. things could be worse. but this approximate 1/2 year relationship is starting to change me. i'm starting to wonder about myself and i'm discovering a whole new side me that i had never known before. i want those rose coloured glasses. i'm just too damn stubborn to let my guard down. 11:12 p.m. - 2007-03-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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