♥ ♥ ♥ Sometimes I wonder if you think about me as much as I think about you
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-
i'm considering this week my week of reflection, of intellectual stimulance, my week to be a hermit. i'm enjoying it so far. i'm doing a cleanse that i bought (though i forgot to take some of the pills at lunch) i'm not seeing any of my friends... i'm just hanging out. spending time with my dad's fiance, my cat, kind of doing my thing reading so on and so forth. i wish i could stay in this state forever.
but alas, this is when reality steps in to pay me a visit. i have bills, and work, and a J to pay attention to.
i know he's not all that happy about my week of reflection. he's not confident enough in himself to believe it's not all him. things are okay i guess. i mean, we keep trudging on through all the shit there is in our relationship, which i guess is what a relationship is.
of course M is always on my mind. i was just looking at one of my pictures of him, thinking about how amazing he is. about how my knowing him has changed my life in these past 4 years. his sole presence has shaped my life more than anyone else without even knowing it.
steve has been in my mind lately too. i think it is because i have that 6 month itch with J right now. steve and i had something where we were comfortable with eachother i'm kind of sad that's gone (even though when we did hang out i would go insanely angry). i will have a softball game against him which i'm not sure if i should bring J out or not. if i do, he'll get jealous and this will lead to a fight. if i don't, then i'll feel like i'm holding something back.
work is alright. i'm enjoying my new position and i'm certainly making more money than i would have thought. the drive is quite long, so i'm sure i'm making less in the end.
talked to scott tonight, after he comes home from the US i'll go up and visit him. pretty stoked about that, go to tofino or somewhere.
anyway, i guess it's time to shut this off and grab some shut eye. morning comes way too early.
10:06 p.m. - 2007-04-23
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
previous - next
|
|
|
|
|
|
