♥ ♥ ♥ Sometimes I wonder if you think about me as much as I think about you
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i don't feel like i'm depressed at the moment, but all at the same time i can feel my life spriraling downwards. and it is coming down fast. i listen to my fionna apple and my hole cd's, but nothing is really helping me.
tonight is a nip/tuck night, and that means that me kim and rodney will be together to watch it.
yesterday i had quite the social day, and i don't see why i would be depressed, i obviously have people who care about me and think about me when i'm not calling them.
love is in the air for anyone but me.
steve is being extremely distant and i don't know why. he doesn't phone me anymmore and when i talked to him he said that he was really busy with work. yeah steve, your really busy with work, but your having a bbq right now and you didn't even think to invite me. bastard. that shows just how bust you really are.
i went out for dinner with bryher last night that was really nice to spend some one on one time with her. i don't do that too often anymore. and she is the only person that i keep in touch with from high school. i don't really talk to kelly anymore, i left her a msg, but she hasn't bothered to phone me back yet. maybe she will in a week when she feels that she has time for me.
kim now has a boyfriend. i'm not too big on him, but oh well, she really seems into him. my only problem with him of course is the amount of time that she spends with him. i just feel like she is putting our friendship on hold sometimes. i guess i should have to accept that though. i most likely did that to her with out realizing it when i was going out with ben. stupid ben.
i don't think there is that much new lately. i'm still enjoying the bar right now. i worked today and walked away with not bad tips. except i wasn't feeling that well. chances are though, it was all in my head. i didn't want to be there and i wished i was sick and i think my body created that for me. it's like i'm still a kid and i want to be sick so i can miss a test. now i want to be sick so i don't have to go to work and deal with all that bull shit so my mind conjurs up the idea that i'm not feeling well at all.
anyway, i think that i'm going to go grab a shower before i go over to kims house. tomorrow i have baseball for the spot and then i'm off to work.
8:40 p.m. - 2005-06-12
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