♥ ♥ ♥ Sometimes I wonder if you think about me as much as I think about you
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everything in the past couple days
this fine morning i showed up for my biology lab, almost killing myself trying to get there, then i show up and no one is even here. it was absolutely horrible. so now i'm here for 4 more hours before my bio lab, and we all know that i can't study for 4 hours straight. i could have slept in, i didn't fall asleep until 1:30am, and i woke up at 8:30, so i'm writing 2 midterms on 7 hours of sleep. i know that isn't bad compared to what i'm used to, but it still sucks, i would have liked 9 hours. it is my own stupid fault for going to the coffee shop instead of going home.
i got a vertical hood piercing on monday. happy valentines day to me. on one hand it's really cool, but it still kind of hurts when i walk up stairs. but soon that shall change to pleasure. but it's going to suck when markis is out here. to be really honest though, i've wanted mark for the longest time, the longest time... and now i have to opportunity to have him to myself, and i purposely fucked it up. i don't know whether i'm afraid of not meeting his standards, or him not meeting mine, or whether i'm just afraid i'm going to get hurt by him when he leaves. i can't just have sex with no strings attatched. i wish i could, but i have morals that get in the way.
i was in a car accident with my dads brand new truck. i rear-ended a honda civic. that really was not cool, as anyone could imagine. so yesterday i had to go out to richmond and go pay for the accident because i didn't want it to go through ICBC. it cost me $480 cash. but they also signed a form releasing me from any further damage claims for the car and for personal injury. i am waiting on one signature, the lady wasn't hurt, however, here's the kicker, she was pregnant. so she's going to get her baby checked out by a doctor, and then when he clears her she is going to sign the form. i'm going to phone them today actually to see if she has gone to a doctor yet.
today i have 2 midterms, one in environmental biology, and one in ethnic relations. i have to write a paper for my anthro class today, but at this point i'm just a little lazy, and despite the fact that i'm downing a tim hortons XL coffee (triple cream, no sugar) i'm super tired. i could always take a nap in the library on the couches as i've done so many times before. maybe then i would feel more refreshed and able to focus, right now i just feel like i would be studying and looking at everyone around me, staring excessively.
kim is such a good friend. i was working a couple nights ago, and she phoned me to see how work was going, and then i told her i was really really hungry, because i wasn't hungry after that accident, so i hadn't ate all day long. she said she would help but she had to go meet someone to go watch a movie. of course i didn't expect her to make me dinner, i was just complaining. then 30 minutes later she came and brought me a sandwhich, a pear, a bottle of water and a rice crispie square. it was really nice of her. then she came for a ride to richmond with me for moral support. she really is a great friend. i know she's the closest person to me. it's nice to know i'm loved by someone at least, not people who just want to have sex with me, or use me as their counsellor etc. to have an actual great friend.
9:47 a.m. - 2005-02-16
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